in fact, I think I will

Spent 16 bucks on thyroid meds and sundries from the market.

Got some thread and needles for my sewing machine. Gonna try that out for the first time this weekend.

Fucking lonely.

Teaching tomorrow. Dreading it a bit. Having some self-negation issues. Speck on an otherwise clean mirror. Divest emotionally.

My student evaluations from last term were remarkably fucking positive. I’m tempted to reread them repeatedly as a form of affirmation. In fact, I think I will.

Here’s a poem I wrote when I was a teenager:

This must be lilac hill.
I think I’ll lie here.
I’d like to die here.
In fact, I think I will.

I’m not crazy about a lot of the stuff I wrote in those days, but I’ve always liked that one.

Did some math today.

I need a blowjob and a hug.